fortheloveofotps:

sqvad:

pansoph:

pansoph:

i went to a party and put 3 whole loaves of sliced bread all around the house i put bread under the kid’s pillow and in all 3 of his bathrooms, in his rugby shorts and the breast pocket of his school shirt, on his roof and his neighbor’s roof, in his couch and on his tv i’m laughing so hard he’s going to wake up hungover tomorrow and be like why the fuck is there bread everywhere 

image

i’m pissing myself

jesus christ

jesus crust

1 day ago   324153    REBLOG

clocktalk:

saw it comin 100 miles away and I’m still dead

1 day ago   151687    REBLOG
1 day ago   10407    REBLOG
#oitnb  

queen-of-fallen-angels:

jaxs-the-fallen-angel:

howling-rising-demon:

princess-dickhead:

delzdesigns:

Imagine having 2 dads, and then them divorcing and dating other men. Then you’d have 4 dads.

The amount of dad jokes…

"I’m hungry"
"Hi hungry, I’m dad."
"Hi dad, I’m dad too!"
"Hi dad too, I’m dad three."
"Hi dad three, I’m dad."

What have you done

image

2 days ago   75354    REBLOG

thatisnotahat:

I’ve been watching this for 5 minutes and giggling like an idiot.

2 days ago   414216    REBLOG

enigmatic-deviant:

kit-kat-sb:

iraffiruse:

HURR DURR DURR IMA DOG

I DON’ USUALLY REBLOG SHIT LIKE THIS BUT I LAUGHED SO HARD IT ECHOED

so much sass

Cat: Mom look! i’m a dog like you *durr durr woof woof*

Dog: Don’t you sass me child

2 days ago   267341    REBLOG

stilesmcalll:

my dad grew this potato that looks like a shark so he stuck a paper fin in it and he’s calling it Sharktato

it’s on a stick because he likes to move it around and sing the jaws theme song

2 days ago   89899    REBLOG

wheres-my-pie-sammy:

apesmcniel:

#I am sorry

How dare you

2 days ago   1493    REBLOG
#spn  

daddybangalter:

worst news of 2k14

2 days ago   59040    REBLOG

legalwifi:

please can someone create a transparent toaster so i can see how my toast is while its toasting 

2 days ago   45340    REBLOG

ultrafacts:

thescoon:

sir-hathaway:

gryffinpoor:

dudemanbropants:

gryffinpoor:

thepreciousthing:

the-ordinary-nerd:

ask-or-rp-with-will-petrisous:

squad16:

finalellipsis:

bestnatesmithever:

What if it bites me and it dies?

that means you’re poisonous. jesus christ, nate, learn to read.

What if it bites itself and I die?

It’s voodoo.

What if it bites me and someone else dies?

That’s correlation, not causation.

what if we bite each other and neither of us die

that’s kinky

oh my god

this is still my favorite text post collaboration ever

I rarely reblog stuff like this, but this is so damn clever and hilarious.

(Source) for the fact in the picture

2 days ago   519473    REBLOG

bemusedlybespectacled:

liamgalgey:

Mike Wazowski joins the Avengers.

THOR’S HAMMER IS BLOCKING HIS FACE I AM DYING

3 days ago   218462    REBLOG

freedomdefender:

castiel-knight-of-hell:

the Winchesters taught him well

exactly.

1 week ago   34889    REBLOG

constellationsammy:

negativecos:

more fanfictions about muggle-borns sneaking in pencils and calculators, and trading them illicitly, little black-market eraser dealers and “yo I got some graph paper if you wanna fuckin pass astronomy this year” 

can they be nicknamed smuggle-borns or

1 week ago   86912    REBLOG

d-a-n-o-s-a-u-r-:

spookythorngym:

Hey guys look
image

It’s a mii Mario!

BEST FUCKING PUN EVER

1 week ago   103815    REBLOG